While the contractions are uncomfortable, the Procardia just makes me sick - BLECK.
On the outside of the bottle, it says, "Do not take this medication while consuming grapefruit or grapefruit products." Okay, red flag there - wtf is that about? Also, it warns that it makes you dizzy. About the best thing I can compare it to is being lightly drunk, and it causes HORRIBLE headaches. I mean, nearly migraine quality. It also seems to make me slightly nauseous. To boot: I was laying in bed last night, watching television with Derek and all of a sudden, I had a crazy nosebleed. Apparently, this stuff loosens up your blood vessels or something. I just can't stand it...
I'm not sleeping very well, and I'm often up a lot at night. I think it might be that my body isn't "at ease," or maybe it's just that I'm so buzzed off this Procardia stuff that my head is all wacky. Either way, I miss sleeping well.
Today, Derek is doing a bunch of chores, and I'm pretty much sitting on my butt, not doing anything. It's so frustrating to feel this helpless. I started crying this morning because I hate not doing anything. I'm an active person, and I've always prided myself on being capable of doing just about anything Derek can do. Normally, I'd be doing just as much hard work as him. Now, I'm just a helpless vegetable with my giant belly, moaning and groaning just to make it to the bathroom.
Strangely, I can tell that Stella is moving much less than she was. It's like everything happened really quickly. She went from jazzercising on my rib cage to wiggling around every so often. I especially notice that when I'm having contractions, she doesn't do anything. As long as the contractions are away, she is at least wiggling and letting me know she's alright.
In an effort to be better prepared, I went ahead and packed our hospital bag, and I got out our car seat and base. We're going to install those this weekend. I don't want to go into labor and not be ready to go.
I'm still planning to go to work on Monday, and I'm so thankful that my boss has limited the number of students I'm seeing. Typically, we try to have about 12 or so appointments a day, and she cut mine to half of that. She also told me that I don't have to worry about teaching FYE anymore this quarter. We only have 2 classes left, so my co-teacher, Ally, is going to pick up the rest. I feel bad, but I know Ally will be fine without me. She's a pro.
I honestly keep worrying that I won't make it to next weekend. When I told Derek that, he said, "You better make it past next weekend." I know he means well, but it's really hard. I feel like I'm failing or like I've screwed this up somehow. I tried to stay really active, but that was more so I wouldn't gain too much weight. I swear, I was trying to do what's right. I didn't want to cause a bunch of chaos. :(
Anyway, I'm hoping I'll at least make it past my work shower on Friday and our baptism class on Saturday. I guess I'll go back to being a vegetable now. *Sad Charlie Brown music* :(
